One Got Married and The Other One Left.

After my dreamy night with Tony, I had to return to reality the next day. I was quickly jolted into reality when I received a Facebook message from Andrew, he was getting married and wanted to tell me himself. Yes, the same Andrew that was trying to get in my bed less than six months ago had met a woman fell in love and was getting married. It wasn’t that I wanted to be with him but really? He was getting married, already?

Should I congratulate him, I thought to myself? Damn, where is the middle finger emoji? Yes, that is what mature people do. So I shot him a quick Facebook message back, “Wow, that is such great news. Congratulations. Who is the lucky girl?” He replied back with some general, ‘thank you’ type of response and I let it go at that, it wasn’t like I really wanted to know who she was. It crept into my mind a few times that day and by the next day I was furious. I kept asking myself, was he dating this woman when he was in LA last? Was I, once again, the other woman? Technically I was the other woman to Katy; my x had met and dated her before he and I met. After two days had passed I couldn’t help myself and sent the aggressive email, asking all the questions I shouldn’t have asked. I wrote the email after half of a sleeping pill and two glasses of wine, I never read his reply- I just deleted it.

Journal Entry 4/21/ 13

The married one has my head, but I am protecting my heart. I think about Tony a lot. He is such a great guy; thoughtful, kind, smart, wonderful, follows through on what he says and …oh yeah, he is married, and he is leaving in less than a week. He actually said to me the other night, “you should come visit this summer.” I agreed and said I would love to, full well knowing that it will never happen. I knew I was in trouble when I let him come over to my apartment. I never let any men come over to my apartment.

On Tony’s last day in town, he would be working all day. At 6:30 am, I got a call from him. He was at my apartment building front door and wanted to come in. I jumped out of bed grabbed my toothbrush, went to the bathroom at the same time as brushing my teeth, threw some water on my face, ran my finger through my hair and answered the door. I only lived on the second floor, so I didn’t have much time. He was standing at my door with a case of wine.
“I told you I would get you some wine,” he said as I opened the door. I was in total shock; one because he remembered- he had said that the frist night we had dinner, and two because he was standing at my door at 6:30am. He brought the wine inside and sat on my couch, gave me a giant kiss asked me about what my day was going to be like and then kissed me again. He was already late for work, and as much as I wanted him to stay I knew he had to leave. As he stood up he said, “Please come see me tonight when I am done with work, I want to say goodbye properly.” I told him I would love to and watched him walk out my door.

His last night we stayed up most of the night and at 5:30am he left. He had text me as the plane took off and then when he landed he text, “I will miss you sweets.” That was that.

It had been six days, and I didn’t know if I missed him or the idea of him. I knew I missed the feeling of knowing someone was thinking about me.

Journal Entry 5/3/2013

“I want to be in love. I want to be loved.”

After a taste of someone caring about me, I realized that I realized missed having someone to care about and care about me in return. I guess I should be happy to have felt that, even if for that moment.

Journal Entry 5/28/2013

Hawaii for Memorial Day is just what I needed. I was reading a fabulous new book and now had a new favorite quote, one I still love today.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

– Joseph Campbell

I had decided, at that moment, I knew what I really needed was to figure out how to love and care for myself. I wasn’t even sure what that really meant at the time but I would figure it out. I decided the first step would be to celebrate my birthday; it wasn’t for a couple of months, but I usually had lunch with a girlfriend or small dinner. This year I was going to have a party!

I had decided to move out of my apartment as well. Since we had closed the office a couple of months ago, Jack, and I and Style Studio did not fit into my 700sq ft space, and the party would double as a housewarming party! I hadn’t had a real party since my epic 29th birthday celebration, and this party would give me something to be excited about.

When I got back to LA I started planning the party right away even though I wasn’t sure where I was going to be living. Jack was all too excited to jump in and help- he loved anything to distract him from planning the actual move. I was also excited that week because my good friends from Napa were in town and had invited me to a wine dinner. It was always an interesting crowd at a dinner like this and the fact I was seated across from and painfully gorgeous Australian didn’t hurt.

Single and Stylish,

xx Keylee


*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Did He Just Invite Himself?

I held off writing Sam back until the morning after we landed in LA.

“I am good, just got back from Paris. How are you?”

After I had slept in to combat my jetlag, I got up to unpack and run some errands. My apartment desperately needed fresh flowers and food!

The next day a package arrived at the office, I had no idea what I had ordered but I was happy to open it! As I opened the box I could tell, it wasn’t something I ordered, but something sent to me- a gift. It was from Peter, an early Valentines Day gift. The card was sweet, and when I open the box my mouth dropped to the floor. He had seen on my blog a handbag I had posted, the “it” bag of the moment, the Rag & Bone pilot bag. This amazing, beautiful bag was mine? Later that day a dozen heart and love themed decorated cupcakes arrived at the office as well.

I immediately called Peter, “Wow, thank you, but it is too much!” I said, of course, thinking how perfect it was! He was kind, sweet and very excited I liked the bag.

An hour later I get a text from Sam, “Are you still going to Aspen for Presidents Day weekend? I think I will come too!” Wait, what? I thought. Why would he come to Aspen on that weekend? How did he even remember I was going?

“Who are you coming with?” I asked. “No one, I figure we could hang out… I miss you.” Awe, I wanted to believe that he missed me, what a romantic gesture. We would have so much fun in the mountains playing in the snow! He was full of bullshit, but at that moment I ate it right up!

The next day Jaxton called to ask me out for Valentines Day. WTF was going on, was mercury in retrograde? It was like the ghost of boyfriends past were all coming back to haunt me! Sadly I would be in Aspen on Valentines Day, and now it looked like I would most likely be spending it with Sam and my friends. Jaxton rarely called me, and he never had asked me out for Valentines Day, I was sad I wouldn’t be home to see him.

My thoughts quickly turned to the fact that I hadn’t seen Sam in a few months and after eating my way through Paris I had one week to get my body back…. Totally doable- right? That night after work, I went to the gym before meeting a girlfriend out for sushi. After my workout I was feeling awesome; I had really sweated it out. I grabbed a towel and jumped in the shower.

Now a women’s locker room is always an interesting place and a women’s locker room in an LA posh gym is even more interesting! Some women have no shame and choose to walk around totally naked. Some pose in the mirror with no tops on and pretend to be fixing their hair, some try and cover their bodies with as many towels as possible. Then course there is Janice Dickenson shaving her lady bits by the sinks. Not kidding at all, it is an image I will never get out of my head.

I am somewhere in between. I have always loved my body, ok not always, but big or small it was mine and once I was in my thirties I decided I should be nice to her. I get out of the shower and squeeze my hair out. I would usually put on my underwear and walk to get some body lotion, but in my jetlag haze I didn’t bring a fresh pair. No biggie I thought, I will just go commando to dinner. Just as I rounded the corner of the lockers to get some body lotion, I see her. My one “would, coulda, shoulda” guys’ new fitness model child bride. I was stark naked, with extra of me around the middle, and she was a twenty-something fitness model who was dressed in a very chic outfit applying lip-gloss and adjusting her perfectly messy bun in the mirror. They lived in Chicago, why was she even in my locker room??? She had never been a big fan of mine, though I had only met her once or twice, and after a sly smile she turned on her heels and walked out, looking over her shoulder at me as she rounded the corner. I wanted to cry, but instead I just started hysterically laughing. I am sure everyone else in the locker room was convinced I was sharing pills with Janice Dickenson and had lost it, but at that moment if I didn’t laugh I would have cried and I had made vow to myself to not cry at the gym anymore.

She was married to my college love, Mark. He was my “one that got away,” even though I broke it off with him. I try not to have regrets in my life but if I had one, breaking up with him was it.

As I packed for Aspen, I felt myself getting excited and nervous that I would see Sam. I had not introduced a guy to my friends since I had left my marriage. In Aspen, I wouldn’t’ be able to avoid it. I packed the usual amounts of jeans, boots, cashmere, fur and a few things just in case I decided to ski. I also slipped in a few sexier pieces just in case I needed them.

I landed on a Wednesday, and Sam wouldn’t arrive until Friday afternoon, so it was the perfect time for me to settle in and see friends. After a boozy rosé lunch one afternoon the girls decided to go shopping. The new Rag & Bone store had opened and I just happened to stumble wonder in. After a few moments of wondering around I laid my eyes on the most perfect pair of leather pants I had ever seen. As I slipped them on I knew, I was in heaven. They fit like a glove, and my ass looked amazing! I had to have them. One issue; the price. I wasn’t really in a position to pay that much for a pair of pants; it was a half of my monthly rent! After a few moments, I had rationalized myself into the pants.

The next day Sam arrived into town and text me the moment he landed.

“I am here, what’s the plan?” He text.

“I will be at après later, meet me there?” I text. I didn’t want to seem too anxious.

I arrived at après the appropriate amount of late and walked in with a group of friends. I was a bit nervous to see him, and it bugged me. My friends and I went to the bar, I spotted him as moved across the room but didn’t didn’t let him know. He moved toward me at the bar and smiled. Once I saw him, I couldn’t help but show my excitement.

After several rounds of drinks, we decided to clean up and go for sushi. Couple friends of mine were game, and I was excited for Sam to know them. I rushed home, showered and threw on my sexy Wolford tights with my favorite long sleeve ALC dress and headed to dinner. I was determined not to be an easy get that night, but it didn’t hurt to make him want it.

Dinner was amazing, Sam ordered a fabulously expensive sake. We ate sushi till we were going to burst, danced at a club, at the end of the night I said goodbye and went home.

Sam wanted to ski the next day and even though I was totally inept I said yes because I had an invite for lunch at the top of the mountain and could bring a guest. After lunch, I told Sam I would meet him at the bottom. He was a much better skier than I, and it made me even more nervous to have someone watch me while I took my time. By the end of the day, we were skiing together more, and it was perfect. After the we skied down during the last run of the day we went straight to après and had a drink! We had dinner plans that night as well so again; I went back to the house I was staying at; showered and changed. Only this time I decided to give my new leather pants a run. We were invited to a big group dinner, and though I was nervous about taking Sam, it was fun! He was interesting, funny, the right amount of attentive and made everyone at the table adore him. I am sure I was beaming. Soon after my 100th glass of wine, not a real number.. I am just estimating. We decided again went dancing and then decided to have one more drink….at his hotel. Needless to say I got to experience three-move man again and the next morning my walk of shame home in a full-length mink coat was not my proudest moment. I left his hotel early in the hopes to not run into anyone I knew. When I arrived at the home, my plan was to sneak in and get a few more hours of sleep. As I sat in the mudroom taking off my shoes and coat, my friend Ted walked up the stairs. Ted was a very close friend, almost like a brother.

“Where are you going this early?” He asked.

Before I could even make up a good excuse, a huge smile came over his face as he looked at me from head to toe (realizing I was wearing the same thing as last night).

“What?!?” I said defensively. Which only made me blush and look super guilty.

“Are you just coming in?” He said with a huge grin.

I removed my shoes, looked at him with a slight smile and said, “wouldn’t you like to know?” I walked down the stairs to my room and went back to sleep.

Single & Stylish

xx Keylee

The only thing I do not like living in Los Angeles is our lack of seasons! I have a lot of sweaters, boots, and coats that never get the wear they deserve. This time of year is my weakness, all the fabulous winter favorites go on sale!!! Here are a few things that are perfect for a mountain getaway or just enjoying brisk weather!

*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

New Year, Same Me.


Happy New Year!!! After being sad during my first single Christmas since I was in elementary school, I was determined to make the most out of New Years Eve. In reality I hate New Years Eve, I have never had a great one, and it is always over-hyped and then a huge letdown. I had convinced myself this year would be different. I had bought a table at my membership club and invited a group of single friends. Once I decided I wanted to go out but didn’t want to chase the party everywhere. I wanted to be in one spot – this was a guaranteed party.

I wasn’t feeling my best in the self-confidence department and knew the NYE staple look for most women, short and tight, was not my cup of tea this year. The party was black tie, and I decided to wear my new favorite dress that Sam had bought me on our shopping spree in Miami. The green flowing DVF dress that made me feel like I was wearing Halston. New Years is a lot like Halloween in respect that you can get away with wearing just about anything; regardless of your age or the weather.

The girls got ready at my place; I had hired one of my favorite makeup artist, Lisa G to do our makeup and hair. I had massive hair extensions that I wanted to wear and knew that it was more than I could tackle. I popped the champagne, opened some caviar, and the night had begun. They had transformed the club into an underwater adventure, and it was fantastic. The night, overall, was fun, and I am glad I wasn’t sitting home crying into my whiskey, but per usual though everyone was drinking. People were getting sloppy drunk, and I was wondering who would be my midnight kiss. As the countdown began we all raised our glasses and shouted at the top of our lungs; five, four, three, two, one, Happy New Years! I did end up having a midnight kiss, but it was a gay BFF, so it didn’t count actually.

I woke up the next morning only slightly hung over and highly disappointed. Though I acknowledge that New Years is always a let down I love the idea of a new year. It was always exciting to me to think about being able to set new goals, feel refreshed, take a step forward in time without looking back- it was exactly what I needed this year. I was ready to tackle 2013 like a boss! So, of course, when I woke up I expected to wake up feeling like a whole new me; New Year, new me-, right? Nope, not the case. New year, same me. I laid in bed and stared at my chandlier on my ceiling.

The past year had been monumental. Maybe it wasn’t in the way I hoped and planned for but it was life changing. I talked to myself for a good hour saying things like; “you might not feel different today, but you never know what tomorrow brings!” And, “This is the first day of a new year, and anything can happen.” Then I had a bright spot, a light bulb went off. My divorce would become final with the state of California this year! California has a six-month statute of limitations and thought I didn’t know the exact date, I knew it would be sometime in 2013. That was something I could get excited about!

I had a brief thought of wondering what my x-did on New Years Eve and that lead me to think about New Years Eve 2012.

We had been invited by friends to Napa to attend a dinner party of a very chic couple that we knew through friends. It was a very grown up civilized dinner party, just how I like it. My husband had two friends that didn’t have plans, and he thought it was totally appropriate to invite them and their dates to come along. I thought it was completely and totally rude, and I could NOT believe the idea had even crossed his mind. We were basically guests of guests, and I was not about to invite more guests! He ended up asking the hostess because I refused. Being the gracious woman that she is, she suggested that they come after dinner to ring in the new year- as the dinner table was full. The two of my husbands friends that I am referring two were work colleges and close friends. I always had liked them, but when they showed up with “dates” that, I am fairly sure, were paid by the hour I decided I was not such a fan. I had never been so embarrassed, and I wanted to kill my husband!

At midnight grew near I decided to put it behind me and kiss my new husband at midnight! I was so happy; a new dress, new lipstick, and a new husband. It was my most perfect New Years Eve to date.

The next morning we went to breakfast with our hosts, loaded Jet into the car and headed back to the city. I was excited to have spent the quality time together with my husband even if it was just a few days. We were still newlyweds, and I would take all the time with him I could get. The day after Christmas, he had received an “urgent” call to from his boss. It seemed a group of workers at the company were preparing to strike, and they were pulling all the executives together for an off-site to come up with a plan to avoid it. It was urgent and had to be taken care of before the end of the year. In reality, he was spending time with Kathy. I would later learn he spent four nights six blocks from our home in a hotel with her and their dog. From the photos, I would later find on Facebook it seemed they had a wonderful time. Eating out, at our favorite places, seeing the tree in Union Square, working out together… It was just lovely. Thinking about it today makes me laugh. It is like Sliding Doors; one moment could have changed everything. Had I crossed the street at a different time, maybe I would have bumped into them or if a friend had said, “let’s go to dinner at Zuni.” I could have been seated next to them. I don’t know why I never caught them together, but it is fun to fantasize about what I would have said! It is definitely not rated PG.

Single & Stylish,

xx Keylee

I have never met a DVF piece I didn’t love, or at least like. The green dress Sam bought me is still one of my favorite gowns. The latest collection is no exception! Here are a few of my current favorite pieces.

*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

All About The Lips.

Happy New Year!!! I had to take some time off the blog due to my schedule while styling a film, which is going to be amazing by the way! I am back and the blog will continue on its regular schedule. The story will catch up quickly and will back on track to two years ago before you know it!

I will be adding things to the blog in 2015 that will be informative, honest, tip giving, emotional and fun. Beauty, dating, men, women, style, travel, life… you will find a little bit of everything all with my usual Keylee Style flair. Please feel free to comment on any of the posts on my social media channels and share the blog with anyone, and everyone, you can!

I hope everyone is having a beautiful start to 2015!!!

And now onto the next part of my story…….

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